I miss....

my children! I never knew that I could miss them as much as I do right now. My babies have been in NC with my mother for the bulk of the summer, which was a well deserved break for my husband and I but Lord knows that I didn't realize how much I would miss their little faces.

I miss their voices and foot steps running down the hall

I miss their greetings when I walk in the door

I miss their smell after a long day in the sun, ready to be bathed and refreshed ... oh my little ones.

I miss preparing their meals and reading them bed time stories

I miss breaking up 'fights' between the boys over Thomas the tank engine toys I miss hearing Mommy, mommy over and over again.

I miss my babies more then I could imagine and don't understand how any true parent would abuse the lives they bring into the world. Mistreat them and give them away. I don't understand how a woman could allow a child to develop in her womb close to her heart and then let the cares of this world treat that precious gift with little to no regard. With my children away I have a new resolve to be a better mother.

I vow to be more patient and understanding, gentle and caring. I promise to take out time to read that story two times if they ask me to. I miss my children and because of their absence I think I'm going to be a better mother. In their absence I've learned a lot about myself and being the mother of those three is who God made me! I'm counting down the day until my flight out to retrieve my reason for being...

My three little Brown babies... they'll be home soon.

Until next time...

MUAH

Unlikely Jobs...

Hey Folks:

When I came into the office this morning there were two gentlemen washing our windows both inside and out. I am on the 6th floor of a building in NYC. Being me I of course started a conversation with the guys and learned something new.

Did you know that window washers have to take classes and earn a certificate to become window washers especially those who work on scaffolds? Well they do! Window washing is no easy task but it's a job that somebody has to do it!

This education of course opened a can of worms for me because when I learn something new I have to expand on that education. I got to thinking about all the jobs that are done in NYC alone that we never really think about. That's when I cam across the movie "Up There" this movie is about the men who paint advertisements on buildings. It was really thought provoking so I figured I'd share it with you!

Hope you enjoy the movie.

Until next time...

MUAH!

Adoption Wednesday - Vanessa Bennett

Hey Y'all:

Welcome to the latest edition of Adoption Wednesday. Over the next few weeks I'll be featuring a question and answer series with my siblings.

Today you'll be hearing from Vanessa the third child my mother adopted and my first baby sister. Vanessa is the mother of two little boys and is a fabulous dancer. As a young girl she was a member of a Praise Dance group with the rest of my little sisters called "Divine Purpose" she was truly a cut above the rest. When I went to see Alvin Alley perform earlier this year I wished she would have continued dances, she was just that good!

When did you realize that you were adopted and how did it feel knowing that you were?

I realized I was adopted about the age of 7 or 8 yrs old.Truthfully I didn't know how to feel about it.I had a big family & was taken care of & that's all that mattered.

As a mother what is your description of a mother’s love?

In my opinion a mothers love is true devotion,much sacrifice,unselfishness,patience & endless forgiveness.

If you could ask your biological parents one thing what would it be?

I would ask them "Why were they so selfish?". In my case I was left in a hospital with no identification(just abandoned),with strangers to determine my fate/future.Its mind_bottling to me.

Would you ever adopt a child? Why/Why Not?

Of course I would adopt.I feel every child needs love and someone to count on and love them.Just to give someone the opportunity I was granted would be awesome!

If you could grant one wish in the world who would it be to and what would it be?

If I could grant a wish it would be to my MOTHER Marian Bennett,and it would be that for once in her life she didn't have to worry or take care of anyone but herself.Her whole life has been dedicated to her loved ones.I would just make sure she travels and sees everything life really has to offer and what she has to offer the world.I just want to see her satisfy all those personal desires/goals! That would be my ultimate wish!

Thanks Sis for sharing.

Until next time...

MUAH!

Grandma's Fruit Cake!

Hey Y'all:

It's late July and yes the title to the blog is correct.

As you know I'm a huge fan of A&E and can watch back to back episodes of Intervention and Hoarders. I say that because I think we need an intervention for hoarding an item for my children's great grandmother.

Over the weekend we went to visit her and discovered that she still had a fruit cake in her refrigerator from December! Grandma's rationale is "I paid for it so I'm going to keep it". Apparently said fruit cake was 'gushy' on the inside (it had to much fruit) so she didn't want to eat it. Instead of tossing her $40 Grandma; who is 85 years old and in her right mind (praise God) decided that she is going to keep the fruit cake in the fridge until she gets ready to throw it away (which I don't think will be any time soon!)

Although this is madness I have learned a lesson from this; it's important not to hold on to something just for the sake of your investment. Just because you purchased that chair 25 years ago and it holds sentimental value doesn't mean you should keep it if it now has holes and smells bad. It has outlived it's usefulness and is now just taking up space. The same goes for relationships, don't hold on to someone because of the memories or 'the way we were'. If the person is longer enhancing your life get rid of them! Keep the memories and get rid of the junk!

That fruit cake is taking up space in Grandma's fridge but are you allowing someone who doesn't deserve a place in your heart to take up space there?

Until next time...

MUAH!

Things to do while the children are gone....

Hey Y'all:

My kiddies are hanging out with Nana for the better part of this summer and although I miss their little faces more then I could ever imagine I'm going to make good use of their time away. Here is my list of 10 things I promise to do while they are gone.

1. Start a new series on The B.O.N.E. Chronicles a blog I host for my hubby's music site. The new series will be all about Musicians Wives!

2. Date night with the hubby. Whether it's in the house or out and about we are going to spend quality time together. I have been following through with this by attending his Tuesday night gigs at Ashford & Simpson's Sugar Bar in NYC. I've been having a ball!

3. Clean/Organize Erick's Room.... This is going to be a rather large project but it has to get done. The bookcase has to be removed (consolidating his books onto my shelf too much drama with those three)

4. Get rid of the paper clutter! I can't take it anymore my desk is a mess...

5. Sleep in at least one Saturday!

6. Have a party! I'm hosting a House party at the end of July with Kleenex product - the new hand towels- I'm really excited.

7. Go out for dinner with the girls. I don't do this often when the kiddies are in town so I'm going to schedule something with my ladies and have a good time.

8. Finish editing my friends book...

9. Plan for the fall! BTS will be here before we know it!

10. Try not to miss them too much.

I hope you have enjoying a wonderful Summer.

Until next time...
MUAH!

Alternatives to TV

Hey Y'all:

Found this one in my in box and thought it good enough to share!

From BabyCenter.com written by Kya Fawley

Tap into the power of pretend play Try initiating a make-believe game with your child, suggests Jerome L. Singer, co-director of the Family Television Research and Consultation Center at Yale University. Not only will pretend play give your child ample opportunity to practice using his imagination, says Singer, but research shows that kids who play make-believe tend to be happier than other kids. For example, pretend you're at your child's favorite restaurant. Outfit your child with an apron and help him set up a table and chairs for his stuffed animals. Or, pretend you're going on a picnic. Set out a blanket with a picnic basket and ask your child what kinds of food he would pack.

Homespun place mats You'll be amazed at how quickly your child will choose an art project over the tube when you present him with the choice, Kenworthy says. Try setting up a craft table with glue, markers, construction paper, scissors, beans, and various types of uncooked pasta and dried beans. Your child can create colorful place mats for family members and decorate the borders with the beans and pasta.

Cook up a story. Tell each other stories, suggests Kathy Kenworthy, who teaches preschool at the Broadway Children's School in Oakland, California. Try using kitchen items for inspiration. For example, the pasta you are about to dump into the boiling water can represent scuba divers on a daring mission. Encourage your child to add to the tale or start one of his own. "Telling stories is terrific for children's language development," Kenworthy says. Not only does telling stories help children organize their thoughts and learn new vocabulary, but communicating with you boosts their self-esteem, she explains. Tip: Your child will love hearing about a main character that greatly resembles him.

The chef's assistant. Why should you and your partner do all the work — or have all the fun, as your child may see it? Have your child help you cook. While you don't want your child to use sharp knives or cook over flames, he can do plenty of things to help you get dinner on the table. Ask your child to toss the salad, find ingredients for you, set the table, or husk the corn, suggests Marilyn Segal, dean emeritus at the Family and School Center at Nova Southeastern University in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. "Children feel very grown up when they're given a job to do," she says. To help your older child see a task as fun instead of as a chore, make a game out of it. For example, challenge your child to find ingredients or set the table in less than three minutes.

Experiment cakes. Give your child the opportunity to do some creative cooking of his own, Kenworthy suggests. To start this activity, set out a large mixing bowl and ask your child what he would like to make. Let him pick out the ingredients but encourage him to choose items he's likely to need, such as flour and eggs.

When you're ready to cook the family dinner, place your child's experiment cake in the oven. (Look up what your child intended to make in a cookbook to estimate the temperature and cooking time.) When the experiment cake is done, let your child taste it. The cake might taste horrible, but the activity will teach your child some basic cooking skills and help him feel comfortable in the kitchen. "The process is more important than the product," says Kenworthy.

Nifty napkin holders. If your child likes art projects, sit him at the table with pipe cleaners, beads, and old buttons, Kenworthy suggests. These objects can generate a lot of different creations, including napkin holders. To create napkin holders, string beads or buttons on a pipe cleaner and tie the ends together to form a circle. Encourage your children to string the beads in a pattern, Kenworthy says. Note: Pipe cleaners have sharp ends, so fold the edges over before giving them to your child; remember that large beads and buttons can be a choking hazard for children 4 and under.

Magnificent menus. Tired of sweating over a hot stove only to hear your child declare he doesn't like what you've prepared? Have him help you plan the menu for the week. To save yourself from a diet of Oreos and ice cream, challenge your child to pick nutritious meals. You may want to talk to him about the food pyramid and the benefits of each food group. Warn him about any family members who are allergic to certain foods or refuse to eat them. If your child is too young to write the menu down, suggest that he illustrate it. By the time he's done, dinner should be ready.

Playful pizza. Buy readymade pizza dough and give your child a bowl of tomato sauce to smear on the crust. Then let him decorate it with pieces of grated cheese, pepperoni, olives, slices of tomato and pepper, and anything else you'd like on the pizza. After you've cooked the pizza, point out how the ingredients look different (mushrooms shrink, cheese melts, colors deepen) after they've been cooked.

Bubble delight. Creating bubbles is a great learning activity for kids. Set up a basin of water with a little dish soap, Kenworthy suggests. Drinking straws, rubber bands, and strawberry baskets can all be used to blow bubbles. Your child can experiment by using the different objects to create bubbles of different sizes. Be warned that while your child is mastering the art of bubble creation, you may end up with a lot of water on the floor.

Kitchen science. Your kitchen is full of ingredients that your child can use to learn basic scientific principles. For example, try this experiment: All you need is a celery stalk that still has leaves, water, and a few drops of food dye. Have your child put the celery stalk in a cup of colored water and ask what he thinks will happen. In about three hours the plant will absorb the water and the stalk and leaves will change color.

Or, give your child a large magnet and let him search the kitchen for objects he thinks will stick to the magnet. He'll notice that the magnet sticks only to certain items, which will give you a chance to explain how magnets work. (Magnets are attracted to other items with magnetic properties such as things made of iron or steel.)

Turn the TV off and "get to gettin" (said in a very Niecy Nash voice)

Until next time...
MUAH!

When it's all said and done.

Hey Y'all:

With all the hype surrounding what team LeBron James will join I came across an article about Ex-Celtic player Ray Williams. Mr. Williams was a 10th overall pick in the 1977 NBA Draft by the NY Knick's, after playing for six different teams he retired in 1987 and is now homeless.

I share this with you because when it's all said and done will the LeBron James' of this current generation find themselves in the same shoes as Mr. Williams? With multimillion dollar basketball contracts, basketball wives wearing rings that could feed a small country for years to come and product endorsements up the yin yang is it possible that these young men will become broke and broken?

Will they have viable educations to fall back on and post basketeball careers that will soar like Magic Johnson and Michael Jordan after they retire or will they; like Ray Williams be bankrupt asking for financial assistance from the Legends Foundation? What I ask will be their fate?

I pray that all of these ballers and shot callers are preparing themselves for their future you know... for when it's all said and done. I hope they are investing their millions wisely and not just spending it all on material items that will quickly perrish. I hope they are contributing to foundations that have been impactful upon their lives and I certainly hope they are setting up legetimate trust funds for their childrens children!

If nothing else reading of Mr. Williams unforturnate turn of events it helped confirm for me that no matter how good you may be at some point it's all going to be "said and done" and you must be prepared for that. Live each day as if it's your last in how you treat people, although tomorrow is not promised you should keep your furture front of mind. Always be prepared for the if's in life!

Until next time...
MUAH!

Adoption Wednesday: My Baby Sister

Hey Y'all:

For this edition of Adoption Wednesday I'd like to share a brief question and answer I had with my baby sister Tawana Bennett. Tawana is the 8th child adopted into our family. She is a beautiful young woman who is weeks away from welcoming her first child into the world. Her life's dream is to become a nurse.

Our mother was very open with them regarding there adoption and their biological parents. She always let them know who they were and told them that they could have a relationship with their family if they chose to do so.



Hey Little Sis thanks so much for agreeing to this interview with me. As you know I am an advocate for adoption. It’s because of the eight of you guys that I am so passionate about domestic adoption. I want to ask you a few questions and you can be as candid as you like.

When did you realize that you were adopted and how did it feel knowing that you were?
I don't think it was a certain age when I knew. I have always known for as far back as I can remember. I felt happy that I had the family that I did and realized that was the best decision my biological mother could have made.

Now that you are going to be a mother what is your description of a mother’s love?
Unconditional no matter what.

If you could ask your biological parents one thing what would it be?
I would ask them why after all these years you still cant get yourself together and how can you know you have kids and not care enough to do better.

Would you ever adopt a child? Why/Why Not?
Yes I would adopt because a lot of kids come from terrible situations and they deserve a chance to have love and a good home.

If you could grant one wish in the world who would it be to and what would it be?
If I could grant one wish it would be to God and I would ask him to make my (adoptive) mother happy everyday for the rest of her life because she's done a great job as a mother and has made a lot of people happy in her life.

There you have it... stop by next time when another one of my siblings will answer the same questions.

Until next time...
MUAH!

Elimination Communication

Hey Y'all:

The truth is that you do learn something new everyday! I am the proud mommy of three, oldest of nine and have loved kids for as long as I can remember but I have never ever heard of Elimination Communication. By the title alone I can tell you upfront that you are about to learn something new today thanks to MrsDeveter.

A couple of nights ago I was one among a standing room only Tribeca Film Center; New York Women in Film & Television screening. A co-worker of mines happened to be in a documentary titled Latching On: The Politics of Breastfeeding in America which was an awesome film by Katja Esson. It gave insightful information on breastfeeding and the social and cultural forces that helped replace mother's milk with formula produced by a billion dollar industry. Latching On was really eye opening and educational.

The first movie however that was shown was titled My Toxic Baby by Min Sook Lee. My Toxic Baby was a 46 minute documentary by a new mother who discovered that baby bottles include a chemical byproduct linked to impaired health and serious diseases, this discovery lead her on a journey that exposes the hidden dangers lurking in infant bath soaps, diaper rash creams, teething toys and many other products for children. Within this documentary were women who practice green living and most importantly (to the post anyway)

Elimination Communication

Is a toilet training practice in which a caregiver uses timing, signals, cues, and intuition to address an infant's need to eliminate waste. Caregivers try to recognize and respond to babies' bodily needs and enable them to urinate and defecate in an appropriate place (e.g. a potty). Caregivers either use diapers as a back-up in case of misses, avoid the use of of them altogether, or do a mixture of the two. EC emphasizes communication between the caregiver and child, helping them both become more attuned to the child's innate rhythms and control of urination and defecation. The practice can be done full time, part time, or just occasionally. The term "elimination communication" was inspired by traditional practices of diaper-less baby care in less industrialized countries and hunter-gatherer cultrues. Some practitioners of EC begin soon after birth, although it can be started with babies of any age.

I have NEVER heard of this. Now y'all know that I've been talking abut potty training the twins for months now (actually going to happen this month as they are heading down to Nana for the ultimate crash course!) but had I known about EC I would have been well ahead of the curve with some money in my pocket!!! While watching My Toxic Baby there were women who gathered together to talk about their decision to use EC which I think is the coolest thing. When this description says babies that's exactly what it means... little tiny infants are potty trained. The parents watch their children and know when they need to go! Can you imagine? It seems to me that this can only work if you are a stay at home parent or if your child is with a nanny or someone who is watching them like a hawk. I can't even figure out how to train the twins much less watch them long enough to know what they do when they have to go (except for Leah she is very vocal when she has to 'go') EC is really amazing to me and if I had known about it I think I would have tried it out.

Check out this clip


Until next time...
MUAH!

Top 10 Things NOT to do this Fourth of July

Hey Y'all:

I've been trying to figure out what I didn't want to do for the Fourth of July and came up with a list thinks NOT to do and I thought I should share them with you!

#1 Do not stay indoors - It's Independence Day why in the world would you want to stay inside? Find something fun to do and go OUT!

#2 Do not forgo the SPF - When you head outside make sure you slather yourself and the kiddies with plenty of skin protection. Sunburn effects every skin color.

#3 Do not forget to get wet! Pool, beach, sprinklers, hydrant or water hose it doesn't matter, it's going to be hot out there get soaking WET!

#4 Do not go through the drive through - Somebody you know is having a BBQ, drop by the grocery store get some soda, water and treats and surprise your family/friends with your presence. No need to give Mickey D's or Subway any of your cash!

#5 Do not be quiet - Independence Day is a day to celebrate. Think about how far you've come as an individual and we have come as a nation and celebrate your independence and do it LOUD!

#6 Do not light your own fireworks - This is dangerous - According to the U.S. fire administration, U.S. hospital emergency rooms treated an estimated 7,000 people for fireworks-related injuries during 2008. Of these injuries, 70 percent occurred between June 20 and July 20 - There are firework displays in just about every American city or just watch the Macy's Fireworks on T.V. BE SAFE!

#7 Do not drink and drive - PERIOD nothing more to say on that!

#8 Do not get stuck in traffic - if you are traveling on the highways or even by public transportation be sure to plan accordingly. Don't waste precious time stuck on the road

#9 Do not go empty handed - If you are going with #4 please listen to the rules make sure you bring something to the BBQ

#10 Do not forget to HAVE FUN!!!! Whatever you do this Fourth of July remember to enjoy yourself and your family. Independence Day is about celebrating so have plenty of safe fun!

Until next time...
MUAH!