Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Adoption Wednesday - Adult Adoptees

Hey Y'all:

You know I like to look at the pros and cons of everything. Eventually adopted children become adult adoptees. They are people walking among us who might feel that some part of them is missing. When they go to fill out their medical papers and are asked about their family history most of them have no idea what to write. When they have children they have to explain to them why they don't look like grandma or grandpa or why their cousins don't resemble them at all. It's a difficult balance that has to be weighted when thinking about adoption. You can't just focus on the positive you have to think about the flip side of the issue.

I found a great article on the Child Welfare Information site on Issues Facing Adult Adoptees. Check it out along with all the other documents I've suggested you read if you are considering adoption.

Until next time...

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Clean and Fresh Hands House Party™

Hey Y'all:

Guess whos hosting a Clean and Fresh Hands House Party! MEEEEEEEEEEE

So excited!
Check me out...

Welcome to your Clean and Fresh Hands House Party™

How much is to much?

Hey Y'all:

As a mom I ask myself this question all the time. How many skittles or M&M's do they really need? How long should I allow them to watch television? How old should they be before I buy them a cell phone? How much is too much, how soon is too soon? When is it enough?

I wonder how many parents truly question how much or when is it enough? I asked this question again recently when I saw pictures of Willow Smith on the red carpet for her big brother's movie premier. This very pretty and I'm sure gifted little girl is now sporting a Mohawk, she's 10 years old. I totally agree that we should allow our children creative expression, picking out their own clothes every now and then (only but so many times you want him to wear the to small superman tee shirt out in public... and the tutu should only be reserved for SOME occasions) but at 10 years old a drastic hair do that will take a long time to grow in, in my book is way to much.

I ask when is it too much or how much is enough because if you allow a 10 year old to shave their heads they'll want a tattoo at 13 then a brand new car at 14, credit cards but no job at 15 and so forth. Once they have received all of the items that teenagers and young adults should receive what do they have to look forward to?

I'm against children being skipped in school for this same reason, I feel they will reach their plateau way to early in life; by the time they are 18 they have experienced more life then a 30 year old. When they are finally fully grown they will try to recapture their youth. Look at poor Lindsay Lohan and so many of the other young stars who have lived so much life in such short periods of time. Now as adults they are making life altering decisions that won't get them a slap on the wrist but time in jail. I'm fearful for these children who are treated as adults way to soon.

So I ask you how much is enough? When is it too much?

Until next time...

Friday, June 25, 2010

Family First

Hey Y'all:

I have a coworker who's dad passed out on a NYC street was rushed to the emergency room with a gash on his head and internal bleeding. She told me of the saga yesterday and my first question was "why are you still here?"

I know that we are in a recession and I also know that it's hard to find a new job but... regardless of how your employer may react when your family is in trouble they MUST be first. I'm unclear as to when we became a society that put family on the back burner and someone elses millions on the front. Unless it's your company which in fact is your family; FAMILY IS FIRST!

Today is the one year anniversary of the death of Michael Jackson and no matter how many fans he had/has, how much money he made, how many cities, countries, continents he toured the only people left behind trying to figure out what to do with his estate and the life of his children is his family. So folks make sure you put your family first they are the ones who matter in the great scheme of things.

Until next time...

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Adoption Wednesday - Older Children

Hey Y'all:

This is a beautiful story..... The Thiel Family

Until next time...

Friday, June 18, 2010

To give or not to give? That is the question!

Hey Y'all:

So I've never been a fan of Erick's Kindergarten teacher. She's not what I had in mind when I was fretting about him having a male teacher. I prayed for a nurturing teacher who would be an extension of what he had in Pre-K.

Ms. H is not even close. She's not a good communicator, she's not approachable and she's inconsistent. Erick has certainly learned this year but not on the level I believe he should have. Much of the homework he received in this Kindergarten class he already completed in Pre-K, so we had to do a lot of supplementing.

All of that is neither here nor there since we are a few days away from his Kindergarten graduation - that he doesn't even get to wear a cap and gown for! dang on NYC budget cuts!!! - based on how I feel about this teacher do we give her a gift regardless?

I created a photo book (hardcover, thank you very much) for his Pre-K teacher and Para teacher. The pictures were of Erick's first year in school, his 4th birthday party, a poetry slam they put on in his classroom etc. I cried at his stepping up ceremony, not just because my baby is growing up but also because I really liked his teachers and was sad that he couldn't stay with them and his classmates forever. This year I think I'll only cry because my baby is growing up!

Is it just the right thing to do? I mean he did spend more time with her this year then he did with me but I'm just saying... there will be no love lost when he moves on to 1st grade. What do I do????

What are you gifting your child's teacher this year?

Until next time...


Thursday, June 17, 2010

Stay at Home Dad's ROCK!!!!

Hey Y'all:

I write a blog for my hubby's music site where I created a 'series' that didn't really take off. Well not yet any way,in the spirit of Father's Day I thought I would share it with you.

My husband is a musician, business owner and “SAHD” What’s a SAHD, MrsDeveter you might ask? We’ll folks it’s a Stay at Home Dad!

Before we became parents I noticed that my talented husband who worked hard for his BA of Fine Arts in Jazz from Purchase College was miserable and seriously unhappy in corporate America, so I told him to quit his job and focus on his music. Two albums, countless tours and now three children later my husband is happy, content and producing more music then ever as a SAHD.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Adoption Wednesday - Aging Out of Foster Care

Hey Y'all:

It's been way to long since I've done an Adoption Wednesday post. I was roaming the web and came across this video on YouTube about children who have been in the foster care system and aged out.

This is why we need people to adopt domestically so kids don't know what it means to "age out!"

Please visit if you are ready.

Until next time...

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Father's Day Crafts and Stuff

Hey Y'all:

Father's Day is Sunday and if you haven't gotten your stuff together yet here are some really cute ideas that will show him how much you and the children really adore him.

This first one is my all time favorite from Disney Family (I'm going shopping for the goods tonight)

I hope I did the embed correctly, if not all of these are for dad but the one I love is the DAD cake; too cute.

Until next time...

Twin Tuesday: Underwear Madness

Hey Y'all:

I haven't posted a twin Tuesday in quite a while. I figured you might get a chuckle out of this one.

Nana sent the twins some underwear the other day. Thomas and Friends for Myles and the Disney Princesses for Leah.

Myles was so excited to see Thomas printed on something that he could wear that he immediately took the underwear out of the package and ran with them. I was in the bathroom getting dressed to go out and low and behold I see my little boy walk in the bathroom with the underwear on his head.

"Mommy shirt" he kept saying "pull it down". "Myles it's not a shirt" I said after I finished laughing hysterically. Poor thing was insistent that it was a shirt and cried for about 10 minutes because he couldn't pull it down over his head.

Oh the joys of boys.

I didn't get a picture of this because it was spontaneous but I'm sure he'll do something new by the end of the week that I'll capture for his high school graduation party photo album.

Until next time...

Monday, June 14, 2010

Will the city that never sleeps go night night?

Hey Y'all:

I'm a New Yorker born and bred and so very proud to still live in the Big Apple. I have a question though, where is the money going? Between the high taxes we pay and the terrible services we receive how in the world is it possible that NY State is in debt? How is it that according to today's newspapers if the budget isn't signed off by midnight NY is going to be shut down!

What does that mean exactly? According to the NY Times:

It would mean that New York’s agencies would not be permitted to pay salaries or issue unemployment benefits to some half a million New Yorkers. Aides to Mr. Paterson have concluded that the state would have to close most of its offices immediately, as well as courts and parks; shut down the state lottery; and cease local assistance payments to municipal governments. Notwithstanding a flurry of stimulus-related construction projects, the state would also be unable to pay contractors.
As if we aren't already dealing with enough in this city, yet another thing is going to cause so many people heartache and pain. UGH....

How are you fairing in your city? MrsDeveter's journey may end up in another city!!!

Until next time...

Friday, June 11, 2010

Who's ready for a good read?

Hey Y'all:

I don't own a Kindle, I still love the feel of a book between my fingers. I still use my library card and this summer I'm sure I'll get into a few good reads.

Thought I'd pass on a list of top 5 summer books for you to consider.
Thanks to my friend Ms. O over at Elev8 for some of these suggestions.

The Ideal Wife - Jacqueline Thomas
Marrying a handsome, wealthy lawyer and living in a Hollywood Hills mansion…it’s a dream come true for twenty-four-year-old Jana, from the moment Lawrence Collins swept her off her feet and into his luxurious world. True, she put her studies at a local Bible college on hold in order to wed after a six-month whirlwind romance. Beautiful and vivacious, with a stunning body, Jana knows men like Lawrence don’t come along every day, and she vows to be a perfect companion — the ideal wife — to this sexy, powerful man. But at what price.

The Shack - Wm. Paul Young (I am reading this right now.. it's GOOD!)
Mackenzie Allen Philips' youngest daughter, Missy, has been abducted during a family vacation and evidence that she may have been brutally murdered is found in an abandoned shack deep in the Oregon wilderness. Four years later in the midst of his "Great Sadness," Mack receives a suspicious note, apparently from God, inviting him back to that shack for a weekend. Against his better judgment he arrives at the shack on a wintry afternoon and walks back into his darkest nightmare. What he finds there will change Mack's world forever.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Summertime and the livin' AINT easy!

Hey Y'all:

The song lyrics say "Summertime and the livin' is easy" George Gershwin must not have had any children because he would have known that when you have children and a job the summertime is just as taxing as the winter, spring and fall! Aint a thing EASY about it!

I wasn't able to get Erick into summer camp anywhere. He's only 5 and the programs that were reasonable and convenient only took children starting at age 6. I found this horrible lesson out by experiencing a NO when trying to sign him up.

The family and I left home early one Saturday morning to sign him up for summer camp! This particular morning it was raining like nobodies business, and it was cold out! We were troopers because we really wanted to get Erick into this camp, it's right up the block from my job and super reasonable.

I was number three in line while the hubby and children waited in the car with the DVD playing their Nick Jr. favorites. I sat and waited until it was time to fill out all the paperwork. I think I pretty much ignored the sentence that said ages 6-13 because I was reasoning with myself that Erick is in Kindergarten why wouldn't they follow the rules of the public school system? If he's old enough to be in Kindergarten; surly he could spend a summer in camp! Well I walked up about five flights of stairs, filled out about 6 pages of information and waited for my number to be called. The young lady checked my paper work... so far so good I thought. Until she got to the D.O.B. 2004 was the year she saw, she must have been trained to look for the year 2003 or anything earlier, she look at me and said "sorry".

I thought for some strange reason that I could 'reason' with this woman, convince her that my boy was a mature 5, I worked right down the block and was confident that he would be fine. "He's in Kindergarten", I said almost near tears. She looked at me and said... "Sorry Mrs. Brown maybe next year."

So my 4th of July weekend will be spent on the road taking him down for a two week visit with Nana. We'll just have to wing the rest of the summer I guess! Ugh!

What are you doing with your little people for summer vacation?

Until next time...

She's Back...

Hey Y'all:

Sorry I've been MIA but my brain was in need of a break! I'm back and have plenty to share.

Last night by beautiful big boy kissed me every so gently on my cheek and then my arm and said "Mommy I love you. You are my girlfriend."
"I love you to but I'm not your girlfriend, I'm your mommy" I replied
"You can be my Mommy and girlfriend" he said
"No, I can only be your Mommy because I'm Daddy's wife " I reasoned. "I love you very much because you are my son but I can't be your girlfriend"

He didn't say much about it after that response but it got me to thinking. Mother's are a sons first love. His relationship with any women will be defined by the relationship he has with his mother. If Mommy is affectionate and loving toward her son she's teaching him how a woman should treat him. If she is rough and unyielding, that is what he will come to expect out of relationships with other women.

I pray that Erick and Myles will continue to think of me as their 'girlfriend' that way I won't have to 'dress down' the little girls they bring home for me to meet in the near future. I'll be the only example they'll ever have of a woman; giving them ability to know exactly what they want, need and deserve in a woman. A woman like me!

Until next time...